Mordred, We Hardly Knew Ye
FC
So for those of you with even an
inkling of the King Arthur saga, Mordred is a relatively minor
character in most versions of the legend. Mordred is the bastard
nephew of Arthur, who just happens to be Arthur's son as well.
Morgause, Arthur's half-sister, lured him into bed (he didn't know
they were related, but she did) and they conceived Mordred. Talk
about the stuff of soap operas, I can't imagine why television or
movies hasn't really tackled this story in a major film for the last
35 years.
Yes, it is 38 years since BBC made a
King Arthur series, and 36 years since the excellent Excalibur.
Recently I saw a trailer for a new King Arthur movie, full of special
effects. So without having seen the finished product, the idea of
bright and shiny “Dark Ages” movie does little for my inner
child. A series of arty little films that deal with various love
stories from the legend have been made, but nothing that tackles the
grit and the dysfunction of the legend. Portraying any of the main
characters of the Arthur legend as pure evil misses the point. If
there is anything certain about the tales, it is that there is
nothing certain about the characters' characters.
Mordred often stirs it up, but other
times he tries to be decent. But how could he not be a mess? After
all, he is the bastard son/nephew of the king. Maybe inbreeding made
this guy a sociopath—nature vs. nurture? We can't hope to know
because before we can really feel sorry for Mordred he pulls
increasingly more evil moves. For instance, while Arthur is off
fighting wars someplace, Mordred declares his father dead, crowns
himself king, and tries to marry his stepmother Guinevere! (Guinevere
by the way, sleeps with Sir Lancelot, whenever she isn't setting Sir
L up to fight in single combat to protect her honor. Everyone knows
Guinevere is sleeping with Lancelot, but he just happens to be the
best knight around and Arthur loves and respects him. So, Lancelot
pounds a series metal-clad knights into tins of cat food to prove the
Queen's virtue. Virtue?) Yes, chivalry means never having to say you
are sorry. Honor, (or honour, as the Brits spell it,) never seemed so
dishonorable.
So why not a movie starring Leo
DiCaprio as Arthur, Jennifer Lawrence as Guinevere, Shia LeBouef as
Lancelot (after all, he was French,) and Justin Bieber as Mordred?
Let's have a monster or two, some karate, and maybe a car chase.
Don't forget a bit of nudity—just a glimpse to keep the film's
rating at PG. Okay, you got better ideas, let's hear them. (My fellow editor Catherine suggests that Matthew McC- fellow and Keira Knightly. Love the Keira Knightly choice, better than mine!)
WE WANT TO KNOW YOUR CHOICES!
The Arthur story is compelling. Mordred
is evil, but it's really not his fault is it? (Sir Lancelot also has
a bastard son, but his son, Sir Galahad is as pure as snow. Lancelot
got a good bastard son.) Of all the characters in the story, it is
Mordred who is betrayed at every turn, and it is Mordred, more than
any other character, who just can't behave. His mother was evil, his
half-brother killed his mother, his father doesn't really claim him.
Well, what can we expect?
And it's not as if it is only Mordred
causing trouble. Someone is always trying to tie Guinevere to a post
and burn her alive. Knights get poisoned, and they murder each other
without much reason. The women try to lure men either to their doom,
or into compromising sexual situations. The men willingly are lured
to be sure. Old Merlin is smitten with Nimue who tricks him into
revealing his magic to her, only to trap him under a rock
forevermore. That doesn't make Merlin blameless. He is hardly looking
at Nimue chastely. The troubles never end. Camelot was not really so
wonderful it ends up. But Mordred is the dilemma that can't be
ignored. Arthur is too decent, and too responsible to destroy his
son.
Maybe that's why these stories
fascinate readers. Despite the evil deeds (yes, there are noble deeds
as well) the characters are all too human. Even in “La Morte
D'Arthur,” written during the Renaissance, which is mostly an
endless litany of battles and intrigues, we get a sense of the
humanity of the characters. Yes, Mordred is a bastard, literally and
figuratively, but the reader can't help but feel kind of sorry for
him—while hating his guts. He is Arthur's only child and an
embarrassment. So he lashes out in increasingly imaginative ways.
If Mordred had ever written his story,
it would probably be akin to Augusten Burroughs' “Running with
Scissors.” Dysfunctional, hilarious, and tragic. Remember, the King
Arthur legend is the soap opera of the ages. Perhaps five centuries
from now, the legend will have expanded to include a whole new series
of modern problems including drug addiction, road rage, and extreme
hoarding.